The First Smell of Success

So today was day one. I got my vitamins, if today was any indication, they’re miracle workers! For the first day in awhile I was not thinking about food all day.
I had a big lunch and probably ate way more than I should have, but that was it. Along with a bit of oatmeal in the morning. I also went on a walk in central park. So I’m hoping it’s not hard to fall asleep tonight, sometimes it is when I’m hungry.
I know this is short but I just need to keep this documented as motivation! Brief success but success none the less:)

A Fresh Start

Well I should start by explaining the fact that i’ve recently made a few posts private. This is not to deprive you of entertainment, as that is the primary reason of this blog. It is also not the result of my embarassment or anything like that. I took to google the other day, typed in a few phrases and my blog was the first response. Should Dick or Steven ever become curious and google a few key items, the posts have been far too identifiable. If anyone knows of a way to give out a password or something let me know, that way things stay between me and you sexy bitches!

I’ve been thinking so much lately, especially since the city’s begun to chill up. I love the fall and winter, although it’s much more enjoyable when you have somebody to cozy up with. I’m done with Steven. Done with dick, even though he basically proposed to me the other night. Through a text message, describing the ring. Just what I always dreamed of. I can’t keep wasting my time on these kinds of men, I am not getting any younger and it’s just time to get it together. Or at least be a better version of myself alone, instead of a shitty version of myself with a loser.
I feel like I’ve kind of hit rock bottom. I feel the heaviest I’ve ever been. I literally didn’t fit into my jeans this weekend. And I can barely go up in sizes. I still get male attention, and I think that’s why it’s taken me this long to really freak out. Guys still check me out, I have a face that can kind of compensate for the not so great body. But I went out with some girls that are skinnier than me last night and all the guys were staring at them rather than me. When they aren’t even all that pretty. It was not a nice feeling. Not that I would date the ogling type, but it’s still flattering.

I think the reason I’ve done things like hooking up with Steven and hung around with dick is because I really am not happy. I am not where I want to be. And some parts of that are not reachable in the short term, for instance I know I won’t be financially secure for awhile. I know I will not have the perfect apartment for a long time. I’ll never have the best clothes or have the most glamorous job. But I’ve got a lot to work with. And even though I can’t be perfect, I can be a lot better and maybe that will be perfect enough for me, and perfect enough for a wonderful and funny and cute man of my dreams.

So tomorrow morning I begin my makeover. Spinning at 645am, a WeightSmart vitamin (probably useless but being healthy is in your head!), healthy eating at work, and then some motivation from good old Gossip Girl tomorrow evening. I promise that I will chronicle my success or failure along the way. I can’t be the only girl in this situation and maybe me talking about my experiences will help someone else.

So wish me luck and I’ll keep you posted tomorrow! Night and cheers to a new leaf – it is fall afterall.

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NY Fashion Week Spring 2009: The Rest

As promised, the rest of my recap! As I write this I am on a wicked flight that could not get me back to NY fast enough. One day trips are just too short to enjoy. Plus I heard from Steven yesterday which I was not expecting. I haven’t talked to him much in the past week or two, and the avoiding worked. I quit thinking about him. He asked me to hang out at like 3 pm. That’s a sober day date. I wonder if he’ll ever ask again now that I dissed him.
Also, Dick texted me last night. Asking me to take a vacation with him. Which I probably will, if he pays. He’s a cheap fuck though so I’m not holding my breath. Plus, I have a vacation planned with Adriana over the holiday so I have that to look forward to. Onto fashion!

Marc Jacobs
Very European and Titanic-ish. Liked it, patterns and colors better than usual.

Matthew Williamson
Incredible and by far my favorite collection. I think I’ll be buying the entire thing. Colors and patterns phenomenal. I’m even letting it slide that my friends say he’s a complete asshole, because I’ve never met him.

Michael Kors
How awful that we rely on him to judge other designers on Project Runway. Primary colors? Really? It was like someone took a kindergarten classroom and puked on it.

Oscar DeLaRenta
If only everyone who made plain yet sophisticated clothes could do it as well as Oscar. Well tailored, well cut, and beautiful.

Ports 1961
Points for having knitting needles and yarn as a gift. I love crafts! But I was expecting knits in the collection due to the gift. Collection was simply not cohesive and not great.

Rag and Bone
If Factory Girl and the Ramones had a baby. Love.

Rock and Republic
Whitewashed denim was hot. Other than that, was slutty and cheap looking.

William Rast
Oh I am so glad I can give this an honestly scathing review, because I despise Justin Timberlake. He’s an egotistical prick and dating that man of a woman, Jessica Biel, who is the perfect bitch for him. Although “beard” is probably more accurate! But you didn’t hear that from me;) First of all, the Canadian tuxedo? Denim on top and bottom? Sickkkk. And there were jean shorts on the men. Klassy. And leaves on the runway. It’s a spring collection dumbass!

Zac Posen
A disappoinment. Not flattering to a woman’s shape. If it makes skinny models look fat, that’s not good.

There you have it! Don’t shoot the messenger, it’s not my fault that for the most part Fashion Week was dull. I believe Valentino said last year that he was retiring because fashion has become boring. No one is shocking anymore. I have to agree.

NY Fashion Week Spring 2009: The Good, the Bad, and the Boring. Part 1

Well Fashion Week is always crazier in January, but this year wasn’t bad. As far as crazy goes I mean. I had a chat with Charlotte Ronson who is really a lovely girl. If course completely overshadowed by Lindsay and Sam’s faux lesbian relationship. I wish the media would leave those girls alone. Holding hands and kissing a girl does not mean you are in a romantic relationship. Best friends spend all their time together and display the same characteristics. Just because one is a lesbian does not make them girlfriends. Aside from the female Ronsons, there’s the sexy as all hell Mark, who made the whole Ronson experience entirely worthwhile.
Of course everyone was up in arms that Mary Kate Olsen graced us with her presence at the Rock and Republic show. Hopefully that means she will stop dressing like a girl who spends forever trying to look like she doesn’t care. I will never understand that! Does she even do anything in real life?
Chace Crawford also showed up, him and MKO should hang out, they’ve both mastered that dirty messy hair look. Chace is just too pretty, by pretty I mean a little girly. The only time he looked hot to me was in the débutante ball episode of GG, when he took his shirt off before him and Blair did it at the Palace.
On to the shows! There were so many, I’m breaking it up into a few installments, for your reading pleasure! PS I’m now obsessed with the Rachel Zoe show, so you might start hearing SHUT IT DOWN from me a lot. I just can’t help it.

3.1 Philip Lim
Pretty ruffles, otherwise somewhat unremarkable, aside from the absolutely wretched menswear. Cropped pants on almost anyone, but especially a man, not good. Moms in Nebraska wear short pants, not a good look.

Abaete
Some nice cocktail dresses, all we really expect anyways. We will definitely be seeing some on our favorite celebrities.

Alexander Wang
It was like the whole RENT cast suddenly won the lottery. This is what they’d wear. And I loved it.

BCBG
Let’s take a moment to discuss how much I despise BCBG. It is not designer. I don’t think there’s anything interesting about it. It’s like a Banana Republic to me. And it’s horrifically overpriced. And never goes on sale. Who do you think you are exactly?

Behnaz Sarafpour
Ridiculously matronly. I’ll be nice since I think it’s cool what she did with Target.

Brian Reyes
Classic but not boring. At the same time, nothing earthshattering.

Carlos Miele
I have to mention this simply because the models were stunning. All absolutely beautiful, and the styling was impeccable. I hope we see the return of the beautiful “Supermodels” instead of these “it girl” models of the moment.

Derek Lam
Drawstring waists: just don’t.

Diane von Furstenburg
Styling was beautiful, I’m personally partial to the look. But I don’t think it was really anything new, not that I expected anything all that edgy.

Erin Featherston
Absolutely gorgeous. If there were fairy princesses, this is what they would wear.

Halston
Loved! Can someone please get their money together and re open Studio 54?

Herve Leger
It is unfortunate that satans spawn (BCBG) is owned by Max Azria along with Herve Leger because I adore it. So insanely sexy. And I think the bathing suits are going to give Rosa Cha a run for her money!

Well I’m off, just landed! More to come tomorrow. Kisses! With tongue.

A Connection is Made

So I am now the proud owner of 2 different phones. Fashion week will do that to a girl, there is nothing more important than staying connected. Lucky for all of you I can now blog directly from my iPhone! Well I haven’t written in quite some time but I have loads of news. I have been at all the important shows, all the best parties, and have all kinds of inside scoop. Expect a full fashion week recap tomorrow morning on my flight to an undisclosed location;)